Dear Friends, Colleagues, and Other,

Thanks for thinking of me—your message has arrived safely and I will take a look as soon as possible! Unfortunately, I cannot guarantee a timely response as I’m currently on the road taking a hiatus away from the internet because it’s all a bit much now, isn’t it?

If you’re checking in to see how I am, I’m well. Thanks!

If you’re asking for a favor, no!

If you’re looking to commission a freelance project, double the rate and then we’ll talk!

If your content is between 4–5 Stars, please contact me in 4–5 weeks if I haven’t already reached out.

If your content is between 2–3 Stars, please accept my apologies. No further emails are necessary.

If your content is between 0–1 Stars, please accept my condolences: We’ve all been there. Drunk texts met with two blue ticks and unanswered emails from HR four weeks later.

In 1991, who would have thought that this is what it would come to?

Good content isn’t gold in the pan that streaks through sand as it falls. I’m taking a break to focus my sight once more—it’s blurred, an all black text on an electric purple homepage. My doctor guarantees a speedy recovery.

Your message will not be forwarded.



Nathan Beyoncé Ma is a Berlin-based content manager, strategist, and consultant.